Hello again!

Well, this is a little weird. It’s been about a year since I blogged and I just read my last post and it reminded me of how excited (and worn out) I was getting ready for our big move to Europe. If you saw my twitter thread recently, you’ll know that things haven’t turned out as expected and I’ll be returning home to Australia as a single mother.

Because of this, my emotions have been all over the place, as you can imagine. But, at the same time, I can’t wait to get back home and return to normal. (According to an app on my phone, I have 55 days, 23 hours, 58 mins, and 12 seconds until I leave) I haven’t written anything in over a year but I’m excited that I’ll be able to get back into it as soon as I’m settled back home again. There are two guys who are demanding my attention to finish their story and give them their HEA so I better move my arse.

(Also don’t be surprised if I write a book about a couple going through a divorce. Inspiration comes from the weirdest places.)

I actually don’t have any news, just that I’m excited to be going home, even if the circumstances are not ideal, but I’m also positive for the future. This is my chance to have the kind of life I want, without having to answer to anyone. It’s my chance to prove how strong and capable I am.

Love and light to all,
RJ
❤

Gratuitous pic of Fatboy x

Some do’s and don’t’s of selling stuff online. And people who suck.

For those of you that have met me know that I’m a fairly nice person. I’m friendly and welcoming even though I think the majority of humans suck. I’m terrible at small talk and it’s the one thing that makes me itch.  However, I will go out of my way to help you. I will do the right thing. However, my stance on the suckiness of the human race has been reinforced by having to deal with people while selling my furniture and cars online.

So here are some tips for you if you’re selling your belongings over the internet:

1. Don’t use your phone. Get a burner phone or buy a cheap sim card. The reason for this will become clear later.

2. If you’re a single woman (or a woman whose husband works overseas) pretend you’re married. Get your neighbour, who looks like a member of the Coffin Cheaters, but is actually a bearded, tattooed, and pierced softy, to act like your husband. (Thanks, John. You’re the best.) If you don’t have a John (or a Barry, Bruce, or a Brandon) tell potential purchasers that your husband is at work and will be home that afternoon or night. People will take advantage of a woman on their own. Not everyone, sure, but the potential is there.

3. If the potential purchasers make you uncomfortable for any reason, don’t let them in your house. Halt them at the front door and tell them sorry, but the bed, couch, TV, whatever, just sold 15 minutes ago. Do not let them in! You are under no obligation to sell them anything.

4. Stick to your price. People will try and talk you down, especially if they know you have to sell. Don’t be unreasonable with your pricing, but stick to your guns. You need the money. If they want it badly enough, they’ll pay for it. If they don’t, someone else will.

Some tips if you’re buying:

1. Firstly, and this is the biggest so listen closely: Don’t be a dick. Turn up on time, be polite, and if something happens and you can’t make it, let the seller know. Manners, people, manners.

2. The seller is under no obligation to sell you their item. If you demand stuff that is above and beyond, like insisting that the seller spends three hours of their time and a few hundred of their dollars getting a mechanical check on the car that you want to buy from them, before you commit to a sale, don’t be surprised when they tell you where to get off. If you want a check done on a car (that’s only 3 years old and has a full history) then get it done on your time at your expense. They have mobile mechanics these days that will come to the house. This is not the seller’s responsibility. Neither is it their duty to purchase a warranty out of their pocket for the car you want to buy, again before you commit to the sale. That’s just not on, peeps.

3. If you purchase some furniture on behalf of someone else, for example, a homeless man that you have put up in an apartment, and need some cheap but good stuff, don’t mistake the seller’s friendly personality as someone you can bully. If she feels like helping you help the homeless man by knocking some off the price and giving you a bunch of free stuff (lamps, pictures, etc) don’t change your mind and ask for a refund after you’ve picked the items up and left. If you change your mind, tough luck. The seller is not a shop. You can’t have a refund. If the seller doesn’t give you the refund you demand, don’t then insult her via numerous text messages and tell her what a horrible human being she is. You got a bunch of free stuff. She’s by herself with no husband to make her feel protected. Feeling like she needs to check all the doors and window locks in the house and go to bed with the phone in her hand in case you turn up in the middle of the night, is not fun for her. She’s probably blocked your number but she knows you know where she lives. You, Sir, are a dick.

4. If you purchase some furniture but don’t secure it in the back of your van and drive like a bat out of hell so the items fly around in the back and get damaged, it is not the seller’s fault. Don’t call her. She doesn’t care and neither does she have a friend that can fix it for you. Just because you have her number and she was friendly and helpful, doesn’t mean she gives a shit after you’ve left her driveway. Leave her alone.

Not everyone is like the examples above. Every once in a while – well, only once for me in this whole process – there’ll be someone who restores your faith in humanity. The couple who bought the husband’s car, Jerry the Jeep, were polite, funny, honest, and engaging. I could’ve talked to them for a few hours. If I had the time I and didn’t mind looking like a crazy old woman in their eyes, I would have invited them in for a wine or three. But that would’ve been weird, so I didn’t. These guys wanted a bigger car to transport their fur babies, and who wouldn’t buy a car for that purpose? I love people who are dedicated to their pets. It’s adorable, and makes me have a little faith in the human race. I like it when the Fates show me that not all people suck. Thanks, guys. ❤

So that’s it. Be careful who comes into your house, and if you don’t have a significant other that can provide that backup, I’ll send you John’s number. He doesn’t require payment but loves it when you turn up with a six pack and some neighbourhood gossip.

Jerry the Jeep is now named James. Here he is with his new owners, Bentley (the lab) and Benjamin (the sausage) I love how they’re all colour coordinated! (Photo used with permission of the new owners)

Till next time,
RJ
❤

Not long to go.

You’ll have to excuse my tardiness. When I started this moving-to-the-other-side-of-the-world journey, I had grand plans to blog about it each week and keep you all informed as to what’s going on. Back then I knew I’d be busy, but busy doesn’t begin to cover it. My limited interaction on SM should give you a clue.

The shit you have to do to move countries is enormous. I mean, it’s only 14,926kms. What’s the big deal? Turns out there’s lots of stuff like taking yourself off the electoral role so you don’t get fined for not voting. Oh, and suspending your health insurance so you don’t get whacked with a huge bill when you return. So many other things which I shan’t bore you with. But the list is loooong.

As of today, I have three weeks and five days left in Australia. Daunting, yes. Exciting, yes. I’m at the stage where I wish it was all over and I was sunning myself on a Portuguese beach already. But things are progressing smoothly. I’ve sold both cars and am now running around in my niece’s POS because she’s gone off to Canada for three months and won’t need it. All furniture that we’re not taking with us has been sold and I’m just waiting for people to come and pick it up. (Don’t ask me about selling stuff online, just know that I will NEVER do it again.)

The house has been leased and the tenants are moving in the day after we leave. Fatboy has had all his vaccinations and health checks and is cleared to fly as well.

My house looks like a bomb has hit it and that sends my anxiety spiking but there’s not much I can do about that, so I just breathe and pretend that being a dirty slob is my new normal.

I just look at this pic and pretend I’m there already. (BTW, my new home is a 2-minute walk from this beach. Not bad, huh?)

I’ll try and keep you updated as things progress and I’ll be sure to let you know when I arrive in Portugal.

❤
RJ

Cleaning house and the things you find.

One of the things I have to do is clean out all my drawers and cupboards before we move to Portugal, and although I’ve moved many times around Australia, I’ve never had to cull so much of my stuff before. All previous moves I’ve done, I’ve just had to box everything up and move it, but moving countries means I can’t take everything. The shipping container is only so big.

So… ditching a lot of old stuff that doesn’t get used anymore is what I’ve been doing this last week. The charity bins near me are full!

When you go through drawers that haven’t been opened in a number of years, you’re bound to happen across things you thought were long gone. There are some good memories in my cupboards. And low and behold, I came across a ton of old photos. I suppose that was to be expected.

I found this one below, and realised I haven’t actually changed all that much.

On to the next cupboard.

RJ
❤

Writing, moving, and plans. WTH is going on?

Most of you would have heard along the grapevine that the Jones’s are packing up house and moving to Portugal.

It’s true. As of today, I have 68 days left in Australia. Which means I have less than that to do a shitload of sorting out and pack up my belongings. I need to sell two cars, some appliances, various pieces of furniture, and take whatever is left (that isn’t coming with us) to charity. I have a big house and also plenty of years collecting a lot of useless stuff.

Who keeps empty boxes?

Turns out, I do!

Of course, I didn’t know I kept empty boxes until I started going through some cupboards. *sigh* Sooo much work.

So what does that mean for my writing? Well, unfortunately, not much will get done. Moving my family to the other side of the world has to take precedence, and I’m sure no one will disagree with me on that.

We’ll be moving to Praia de Galé (don’t click the link if you don’t want to be jealous) in July but then I have the big task of settling into our new life and getting the kids ready to start school in September. Even after the boys start their Portuguese education, I’ll be busy house-hunting (for more permanent accommodation) and generally finding my way around my new home.

I’ll keep you updated how things progress over the next few weeks. I’ll try and keep the writing up so I can release something this year, but no promises.

Wish me luck as I toddle off to tackle more cupboards.

RJ
❤

I’m opinionated, you just didn’t know it.

I need to apologise first and foremost. I have not blogged in ages, and I have no excuse. I’m a lazy blogger. There, I admitted it.

On to the topic.

I’ve sat on my hands to stop from typing something on various topics so many times my fingers are numb. I’ve stopped myself because it is sometimes seen as unprofessional and enough authors have been told to sit down and shut up. We are not supposed to have opinions. We are only to talk about books, book boyfriends, and anything writing/reading related. Apparently.

I keep my mouth shut on most subjects. Like how a debut indie author can top the best-selling lists with no promo and next to no social media. This is not something I’ve been able to achieve, even when I promo my butt off. If I say something I’ll look like a jealous banshee, which I totally am. Maybe they just know how to work the system better than I do. You know, with all their experience and everything. (See! Jealousy) It’s irritating at best.

I try to stay out of any controversies. I may comment every now and then on something contentious but it’s usually when I see an injustice or something dubious. Maybe my professional front is slipping a little. I see authors told to sit down and shut up, not to voice their opinion because they’ll lose readership, and I’ve seen this happen on social media, usually with extreme/abusive right-wingers, but I’ve also seen it happen over small matters such as a difference of opinion.

*Loud sigh* I digress, that is not what this post is about.

This post is about politics. *Gasp* The horror!

I know. I will not be a silent bystander while the world I live in goes to hell. I am an author and I have an opinion. There are lots of authors out there who won’t say anything publicly for various reasons, but are supportive of the #resistance we see happening all over the world at the moment. Let’s face it. There’s so many people filling up our feed with political news and outrage, it’s nice to see a kitty or puppy, or five. Support doesn’t need to be so openly visible, and politics, like religion, is a sticky topic at the best of times. I’ve tried not to rock the boat myself, but well… this particular boat gets me hot under the collar, and if I lose a reader or two that doesn’t agree with me, well… so be it.

Some authors have been told to “stay in your lane,” or to butt out of American politics because “you’re not American. You don’t have a dog in this race.”

I’m a citizen of the world, and this is my lane. My dog may not be as big as an American, but it’s yapping its fool head off right alongside.

From what I have seen online (we don’t get a lot of American news on TV here, thankfully, and yes, I stay away from the fake news sites) Trump is out to destroy the world and make it his own. His decisions in the first week have been reprehensible and morally corrupt at best, not to mention downright scary.

But the #trumpresistance I see happening at the moment gives me the warm fuzzies at the same time as firing me up, making me want to make a banner and start a Perth branch of the movement.

This bit below particularly gives me hope that they’re are more resisters out there than Trump supporters. (BTW, It still baffles me how he got in, but that’s a topic for someone else who knows more than I do. I’m still in shock and shaking my head.)

 

There is only so much a little Aussie can do. But by God, if I lived in the US, you bet your cute arses I’d be marching and screaming my head off. (just like that banshee above)

When you march, protest, resist, or revolt, please know that this little Australian chick, from the most isolated capital city in the world, is resisting right alongside you. I’m here with you.

I could go on, but there are so many people out there who say it far more eloquently than I. So I’ll leave you with this:

Go forth and resist! Resist today. Resist tomorrow, and resist the day after that. Make sure your voices are heard. Don’t do it just for your country, do it for the collective world population who sees what is happening and is sickened by it. History cannot be allowed to repeat itself.

Resistance is not futile.

RJ out.

❤

What happens when RJ is very tired… If I had three wishes

IF I HAD THREE WISHES…

When I’m overtired I get a little silly and my imagination often runs away. This is me right now. While I was waiting for my husband to cook dinner (I’m lucky like that) my mind wandered off. This is where it went without my permission.

Wish 1 – 55% of the world’s population would be gay. Not to make heterosexuals the minority, but to make being gay as normal as going down the shop for a loaf of bread. ‘Homophobia’ would be stricken from the dictionary simply because it no longer existed.

Wish 2 – Everyone would be born with eyes that didn’t see the colour of other people’s skin. People of colour would still exist but because no one would be able to see it, it would be a non-issue. The only reason why we wouldn’t like someone would be because they had better hair. (My hair sucks, so this is totally legitimate)

Wish 3 – Bigotry and hatred would still be a thing. (C’mon. I’m trying to be realistic here.) However, it would be illegal and severely frowned upon so much that all bigots would be forced to leave the global ‘village’. They would start a commune high in the Siberian mountains where they would be forced to live on berries and magical wild elk. These elk would be in abundance and breed like rabbits. When consumed the hateful person would see the light of their ways, be filled with love, and wonder why they believed in the hatred in the first place. Reformed bigots would be welcomed back into the fold with open arms. Bigots who refuse to eat the magical elk die from starvation. Donald Trump is their leader. He’s currently on an intravenous drip of berry juice, but it doesn’t look good. Even on his deathbed he is still an arsehole.

I apologise for being so tired.
I’m off to bed.
❤
RJ

 

For the pirates/parasites. This ones for you… listen closely, fuckers.

If you’re one of those people who are ‘poor’ and ‘can’t afford to buy books because… poor’ and you download them from a pirate website, then you need to listen the hell up.

I am an indie author. Which means I have to pay editors, cover artists, promotion companies, etc. out of my own pocket to make my stories fit for public consumption. This doesn’t come cheap. Let’s break it down shall we?

I wrote a story that I laughingly refer to as ‘The Book That Doesn’t Sell’ so I’m using Indigo Road as my example. Why doesn’t it sell? I have no idea. Everything else I have written, even though none have made the top ten, have sold reasonably well. Except this one.

It has a beautiful cover, enticing blurb and has an above average rating on Goodreads. (4.11 at last look) It’s well written (even my editor complimented it – and that’s as rare as hen’s teeth. You could have knocked me over with a feather) People have told me it’s their read of the year and one lovely reader even made some fan art for me (no one has ever done that before or since) It’s also cheap. Like .99c cheap. It’s almost free. But it doesn’t sell. Why not? I have no f**king clue.

But here’s what I wanted to share with you. Take note, Parasites.

*All costs shown have been converted to USD*

Cover Art $185.00

Editing $255.00

Promo $100.00

Copyright $ 35.00

Paperbacks to onsell $65.00

Total cost out of my pocket $640.00

Remember, that’s BEFORE I’ve even released the book.

Now let’s look at the time it took for me to write it. I started writing at the end Dec 2014 and finished the first draft in mid April 2015. Did I work every day? No, but I wrote MOST days. For arguments sake, let’s say I spent 2 hours per day, Mon – Fri, writing the first draft. That’s reasonable. If I’m working for minimum wage ($17.29 ph in Aust or $7.25 in US. Let’s use USD to keep things uniform) this is what it would be.

2 hrs per day x 80 days x $7.25 = $1,160.00. That’s just the first draft. I’m not taking into account rewrites, editing, proofing, promo etc.

Total cost to RJ $1160 + $640 = $1800.00

Now for sales. I released this book on December 4, 2015 with the original list price of $3.99. That’s about the max I can ask for my books as I don’t have the backing of a publisher and I need to be competitive so I can get my name out there in the hope readers will see me. I dropped the price to .99c pretty quickly when I realised no one was buying it, in the hopes it would gain some traction and lead people to my higher priced stories. Plus I thought an inexpensive read was something nice to do for my readers. That being said, it didn’t work, and this little gem of a read still doesn’t sell. So how much money have I made in 6 months?

USD $530.14

This means I am out of pocket by $1,269.86.

Bloody hell! I knew it didn’t sell, but now that I’ve added up the figures, that’s just freaking ridiculous!

I haven’t even covered the cost of my expenses, never mind the time spent actually writing!

How many of you go to work, and because you love what you do soooo much, you pay your employer for the priviledge?

Yeah, that’s what I thought.

Indigo Road is on various pirate/parasite websites and I know one of those sites has had over 1500 downloads. Imagine if those 1500 people had actually f**cking paid for it! I would have been able to cover my costs!

Lucky for me, my other stories sell and I have managed to cover my costs for them, but don’t think for one solitary second, that writing in this genre makes enough money to live on. For the amount of hours it takes, I don’t make minimum wage, in any currency. I’m lucky I have a supportive husband who makes enough to cover the household bills, otherwise I’d be forced back to work and writing would take a backseat – like it does for many authors out there.

So to the parasites that are crying ‘poor’, how about you step back and have a think. Next time one of your ‘favourite authors’ stops writing because they can’t afford it, ask yourself if you’re part of the reason.

Next time you step into a Starbucks and buy your caramel frappacino with double cream whatever, how about you buy your ‘favourite author’ one too. I’m sure they’d appreciate it.

If, after all this, you’re still ‘poor’, go to the freaking library. Books are still free there.

So to the woman who said “but they can afford it!” No. No, we can’t.

No love,

RJ

 

 

A brief word on personal experiences in writing. Oh god.

True Blue comes out on Friday. It’s only a few days away and I’m full of the normal pre-release nerves you’d expect. Except this time it’s a little different. I wasn’t this nervous when I released my very first story, Out of the Blue.

All authors will tell you how much they bleed while writing their books. We pour out our heart and soul, blood, sweat and sometimes literal tears into our stories. Good. That’s what us as readers want. Me included. I want something that feels real, gives me shivers and smiles when I think about it. I want ALL the feels.

As authors, we sometimes draw on personal experiences for our scenes. (I’m saying this based on the author’s I’ve spoken to about this subject. I can’t possibly know how EVERY author writes.) Writing is an intensely personal journey, so how can we not draw on our own feelings, and the emotions we try and portray, need to come from somewhere. Every single piece I’ve written has a piece of me in it. Those closest to me will be able to see them. Remember the communication problem Cam and Jake had in Out of the Blue? Mine. All mine. Hubs and I still haven’t mastered the art of talking enough, but after 20 years together, we’re getting better at it. Remember the twin’s mother’s cancer struggle in Black & Bluhe? My mum. The hand holding thing in bed from Indigo Road? Yep, you guessed it. That’s what hubs and I do. (aww, isn’t that adorable?) Yeah.

True Blue took me more than a year to write. I struggled with lots of aspects of this story, mainly because a part of it is autobiographical and I didn’t know how to NOT put those very personal bits of me into it. No, I’m not a hot, tattooed fireman in San Francisco, but some of Brandon’s experiences are my own. Yes, I’ve tweaked them to fit the story, elaborated, stretched etc. But the feelings and scenes come from deep within. Often a painful and highly emotional place.

I’m probably giving you more insight into me than I’m strictly comfortable with, but part of me thinks it’s important to remind you that every story, from every author, (probably) comes from somewhere personal. You will more than likely never know which parts they are, but just keep in mind next time you’re reading a scene. You may find that you gain a greater insight into the author than you ever thought possible.

So the release day jitters are heightened with this story, purely because this is so much more personal than anything else I’ve written.

And now stay tuned for the promo:

When being true to yourself means denial is no longer an option.

On the heels of a tragedy, Brandon White shaved his hair, adorned his body with tattoos, and concentrated on his attraction to the opposite sex. Fifteen years later, Brandon is a protective son and a loyal and respected member of the San Francisco Fire Department, bedding anything in a skirt that promises not to stick around afterward.

When his past and present collide in his dreams—including his best friend and fellow fireman, Mason—Brandon knows things are never going to be the same again. He starts to recall that fateful day years before, and the long-forgotten feelings that preceded it. The most important thing he remembers—he’s not as straight as he’d thought.

With help, Brandon learns to accept who he was always meant to be. But when tragedy strikes again, Brandon must reconcile his past and present and deal with his grief if he is to ever be true, not only to himself, but to Mason as well.

**This can be read as a standalone, however it is best enjoyed after reading the first two stories as side characters play a major role.**

Pre-order now at  Amazon,  All Romance, ITunes and everywhere else you usually buy eBooks. Release Friday May 13th.

❤
RJ

I’m not actually here…

I’m really not. By the time you read this I’ll be winging my way to Europe for a family holiday. Right now I suspect I’m somewhere over eastern Europe. I may be about to land in Amsterdam. I don’t actually know, I only know that I’m not where you think I am.

So let me take this opportunity to shamelessly pimp my two newest stories. As the Leaves Fall and As the Ice Melts are both set in England (which I am about to head to after Amsterdam to see family and catch up with a few friends — Are you jealous yet?)

As the Leaves Fall is set in London and features two architects who, although know they shouldn’t have a workplace affair, have one anyway. Can they keep their jobs and their relationship? You’ll have to read it to find out.

Amazon  All Romance

 

 

As the Ice Melts stars my favourite character ever, Marcus. Poor Marcus. This poor bastard really gets put through the wringer throughout his life and consequently has some trust issues and secrets. By the time you finish reading this, you’ll want to pick Marcus up and squeeze him into a big hug. I know I did.

Amazon  All Romance

 

I’m off to spend three weeks with my family and have some much needed R&R. After we leave the London and the UK, we’re off to Paris, then the French countryside. From there we’re heading to northern Italy before making our way back to Amsterdam to come home. What does this mean? Basically it means that I’m not going to be around much. I will have limited access to the internet while away so I will be able to answer emails on occasion. But this is a holiday, I’m not taking my laptop with me because I don’t plan on doing any work. So if you need anything from me, it will have to wait until I get back.

So, till then, au revoir. See you in May.

RJ

❤

PS. I’ll probably post some bragging/tourist pics so keep your eye out.